Well, when I was in high school, being in an all boys school, not many people gave a shit about birthdays and special occasions. The only reason people in my school so looked forward to anyone's birthday is the cheap thrill of "LAUK" (singing the happy birthday song and beating up the birthday boy ramai-ramai). Oh good times, good times. Even when it comes to my family, I won't say that birthdays don't matter, but in my family, a simple wish, a birthday angpow, and maybe a dinner is enough for my siblings. Of course if its my mum's birthday, there have been times she made a big fuss for not having anything special, but to the rest of my family members, birthday is just another day in our life. We don't expect much, neither do we give much. Simple.
However, when I started Uni, I feel like an alien because everyone else is so into the whole birthday/special occasion gift and giving craze. Planning big parties, secretly planning pranks, showering the celebrated with wishes and gifts and many other fruity acts. Like today, I was sitting at my friend's table. On her table was a birthday gift she received today even though her bday was like last week. Hmmm ok. Sweet. Cute. ok. I thought in my head. I wished her the other day, enough right? Then later, I checked out her blog for fun. There was this one entry about her birthday, got la mention about the birthday wishes, and also the gifts she received. It was nice to read that she appreciated all the wishes and gifts, but still, hmmm ok. sweet. cute. ok. I thought in my head. I wished her already, enough la.
Moving on to my girlfriend, for my birthday last year, she got me a brand new ADIDAS sports watch worth approximately RM300. I was like wtf. Why she get me such an expensive gift? No doubt its nice and all, but that puts a personal burden on me to figure out how in the world should I repay the deed or what should I give you in return on your birthday. FYI, to get rid of my own uneasy-with-expensive-gifts feeling, on my girlfriend's birthday, I took her on a little shopping spree that totaled to almost RM300. Not exactly of equal value to what she gave me, but at least it made me feel fair enough (considering she got that ADIDAS watch using money she saved from working after SPM while waiting for results and I'm using my raya money only).
I'm a guy who doesn't like to feel in debt to anyone. Some people say, people give you stuff, you take la with an open heart. I do. But this silly part inside me feels like I should do something of more-less equal value in return. That's just the way I am. Especially among people other than my family. Don't get me wrong. I like gifts. But just not expensive ones. A simple breakfast, lunch, or dinner treat would be nice, a simple card would do, simple gifts less than RM50 would be fine. But anything more than that, from anyone who's not my family, I actually feel shy la wanna accept the gifts. In fact I'll feel in debt to you. I'd rather not. I'm sorry.
I also get kinda guilty when special occasions like Valentine's Day, anniversaries, reunions, and farewells come around. You know, times when gifts may be expected to be given and/or received. Where most people would be giving gifts, I would just smile with my thick-cheap-face and empty hands. Where most people look forward to receiving gifts, I would be hoping to get something cheap or nothing at all. Yeah, I've got issues you must be thinking. I know. I can't help it. I do hope this peculiar behavior of mine doesn't offend or hurt anyone. I do hope to get rid of this dislike for expensive gifts feelings someday.
But until then, I'd like to take this opportunity to tell yallz that, I'm not really a gifts person. I mean material items. I prefer treats for meals and experiences. I prefer to treat people to a nice lunch, dinner, dessert or fun experience. So if you people give me expensive material gifts, don't expect equal in return, but you may expect a treat of some sort though. Oh yeah, and about birthday wishes, just because I don't wish you on your birthday doesn't necessarily mean I don't care, its just that maybe I had more important things on my mind. I don't mean to hurt anyone because of my carelessness. I'm just...well...me. Thanks for reading another load of my brain waste. Teehee!!
2 comments:
you need to give someone a well thought out and really nice gift and observe their reaction - then all the effort and money you put it suddenly becomes worth it.
true story.
the most valuable gifts i ever gave anyone were all handmade...and very well thought of...but i guess material items still win most people. sad.
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